I've noticed along this journey that each step I take route wise or path, there's always something or someone I can relate to. When I first began this trek I swore Mary Jane was my spirit animal. From morning to night, dawn to dusk I was watching Mary Jane strut her shit and relating to her love life hard as fuck.
I later found myself obsessing over romance movies: Pride and Prejudice, Titanic, The Notebook, etc., If someone was dying after falling inove there I lay watching and crying with them and as of now my relating guilty pleasure stemmed from Sex and The City.
Who would've thought that my 19 year old, 6 days out from 20 years old self would be relating to a group of upper class white women living in New York City complaining about the male species and shopping as a way to cope.
Who would've thought I'd relate to the topics they discuss as well as some of their top quality advertised traits.
Of the four its no surprise that I relate to Ms. Carrie Bradshaw. Carrie: a hopeless romantic like myself, a column writer who resembles my diary ranting self who also lives by anticipating the day she's swept off her feet by someone who not only sees her, but hears her as well. Carrie is someone seeking love yet also refusing to fall for just anyone. Nevertheless, unlike her I will not have sex with just any man after the first date nor will I take any of them home. Bradshaw is also into my type. My past type not the white type, but the type who are drawn in and only fascinated by her while also unsure of the lengths they're willing to go to keep her.
That’s my love life, not just hers.
The underlining math of this show is so much more broader than narrow and the discussion between this inseparable girl gang is of a topic I personally feel the female population can relate to when concerning men and their masculinity. By the third episode I was drawn and already relating beyond my usual capacity of relating.
Shopping addiction relating.
Column Reading relating.
Pilate classes relating.
4 times a week relating.
Awake by 5am to make a 6am class, followed by an 8:30am client session was my day.
I found myself under analyzing everything and truly living in the moment through this portion of life.
I want to postulate and say this show started this habitary lifestyle, but I can't. I had been working on my habits prior to this, yet I will disclose that I found myself truly diving into my routine and creating a schedule which was perfect for me on account of it.
Atomic habits, a book I discovered through this journey which entails the details of just how quickly one habit can shape your life and drive forward your future. The author, James Clear detailed how he started off by simply building better sleeping habits which led to better benefits and grades throughout college. He stated in how the process of building habits was the process of becoming himself.
Reading this book changed my outlook on my personal surroundings. I began building habits through trivial things while growing my consistency through them; I am not a fan of messiness yet as a female, going out was the conception of mess so each time I got my clothing out for work I would lay them on my chair in preparation for the day which followed. After doing laundry I would fold and hang all items immediately; If I took something out of its usual place, I made sure to return it as soon as I was done. I worked on being in bed and cooling down by 9pm, that way I would be asleep by 10:30 with the latest being lightly after 11.
This helped for mornings when I had to rise early and lead an energized and productive day. These small incorporated habits had a huge effect on my day. I began focusing on the insignificant things I did in hindsight to the fact that small strides lead to bigger results over time.
One may not notice it at that moment yet by month 3, their whole ordeal has transformed without causing any disruption.
This key point has affected my outlook on my goals as well, I've learned to focus on building my system while working through a maintainable and consistent process. The small and consistent steps will extend growth over time. The goals and aspirations I know I'll achieve throughout the future reflect the current habits I instill within myself. If I am already 19 and achieving these minor consistencies while still balancing work and an inner social life then it is only up from here.
I refuse to fall or waiver through my current placement; I elect to rise above my current withstanding.
The life I am currently living at this very point and time is a very well an angled reflection of my habit instilled upkeeps and the systems I have maintained.
I am training myself to maintain the bar by grasping onto the fact that just because my finances are increasing and going up, does not mean my expenses should as well. The only way to go further and truly flourish is to maintrin my current expenses while increasing my sources of income.
Black girl luxury is not the end goal, but the current goal.
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